Ben

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 06:27:04 GMT

I got into photo for next semester. I am so relieved. I can't wait to go back to Boston in two weeks. It's going to be a great break.

Fri, 25 Nov 2005 09:15:56 GMT

at my grandparents house on long island right now and obviously can't sleep. in two hours though i am getting up to drive back to Boston in order to see friends for the weekend. i think i know why i can't sleep and it's a combination of three legitimate reasons:
1) there is a constant whistling noise created by the heating system which is close to being soothing white noise, but since it is high-pitched and tends to change frequently it doesn't work all so well
2) allergies from the linens
3) it's freezing

it's been great to see my step family, but it's really strange to be around people who constantly discuss buying stuff and getting great deals at different stores. for instance, my stepfather and step grandfather spent hours and hours plotting their trip to office depot, staples, and compusa at 5:30 this morning to save on surge protectors, cd-rs, dvds, lamps, and the like. i also watched three football games today and yesterday helped a friend of my step uncle's move a 40 inch-screen TV from his 4X4 into his house in order to watch sports all day today. though my step family has always been like this, it definitely hits me more now because i'm not used to people discussing these kinds of things at all at school. anyways, i'm really excited to get back up to boston. i hope to see as many people as possible within the course of 2 1/2 days. if i can't see everyone though, it's not a huge deal because my intersession starts in 2 1/2 weeks. i submitted my portfolio for photography right before i left. i really hope all that works out. my professor and a couple friends who are photo majors all sounded confident in me getting into photo next semester so that makes me pretty optimistic. i'd be devastated if i wasn't accepted. i guess that's when i would get on my hands and knees and beg. animal collective was amazing last sunday. i haven't been to such a great show in ages. it was that kind of show which doesn't awestruck you while it's happening, but when you look back on it the next day and you have all the songs stuck in your head you realize how amazing it was. they weren't afraid to play their soundscape-ier songs too which was great. i was really worried that they'd might only play their high energy songs. anyways, i don't know where this entry is going. i'm still congested and cold though so i don't know what else to do.

Sun, 20 Nov 2005 17:45:54 GMT

Tonight: Animal Collective at Webster Hall in NYC
Tomorrow: Finish photo portfolio
Tuesday: Submit photo portfolio
Wednesday: Drive down to Long Island and spend Thanksgiving with step family
Thursday: Eat lots of mashed potatoes and non-stuffed stuffing
Friday: Get up real early to drive back to Boston
Friday-Sunday: See everyone whom I haven't seen in ages

Thu, 13 Oct 2005 13:07:35 GMT

stupid rain

home

Sat, 08 Oct 2005 22:44:37 GMT

and so i'm home for fall break. i'm not used to it all. it's strange to be back in an area where everyone is in a daily routine. i almost feel like a foreigner in my hometown. being around fran's parents telling her to get ready to go to school was weird for me as well because it's been forever since my parents have nagged me to finish my breakfast quick or i'd be late. i couldn't sleep last night at 3am so i layed in bed with a flashlight. i shined the flashlight on every object of my room and was able to successfully have a memory appear in my mind that each object was somehow related to. even a container of tic tacs brought butterflies to my stomach. i've been running around doing errands all day and now all i want to do is sew and listen to animal collective.

Sun, 25 Sep 2005 16:14:11 GMT

Whoa. It's...been...a...long...time. I...don't...know...where...to...begin. I'll write...something...real...soon......though.

Sun, 21 Aug 2005 16:01:42 GMT

Hey everyone,

I left for Bard College on August 6th for a three week orientation and though it's been very hard to adjust and not feel homesick, i'm having a great time and i know it's the right place for me (at least thus far). I'm sorry to any friends whom i haven't called to let you know how i'm doing or to ask you how you're doing. It's just been very hectic the past couple weeks settling but i promise i'll call as soon as things begin to calm down. I have a new phone and a new address, so i'll post those here:

Cell: (617)-777-4607

Address:
Ben Goddard/Bard College
P.O. Box 5000
Annandale-on-Hudson, NY
12504-5000

I miss you all but i know i'll see you guys soon.
Much love,
Ben

Sun, 05 Jun 2005 14:46:19 GMT

i'm graduating from high school today.

what the fuck, man.

yooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeesssshhhhhhaaaaaa.

Mon, 16 May 2005 23:22:48 GMT

i've become addicted to looking through photo albums of my dad's "past life." maybe i'm crazy but i honestly still can't believe how different he was...

that red sweater is awesome. someday i'm going to try to dig it up.

a photo my dad took at a Bob Marley concert. he was obviously ecstatic by this sign back then.

and ofcourse, my dad's old volkswagon.

Sun, 15 May 2005 15:47:56 GMT

I dreamt last night that i was in this mini-army with a bunch of my friends from my high school's jazz band. We were in front of my house in Roslindale and were preparing for a war to protect my house from another army. Carolyn (the jazz band director) was our commander and while we were circling my car in my garage, the other army suddenly appeared from the street. They were lined up with huge machine guns outnumbering us by twice the amount of fighters. The dream then ended with me hiding behind my car and the other army getting ready to fire away at us....

WHAT?

Sat, 14 May 2005 15:12:35 GMT

my dad before he became a conservative at wake up the earth festival back in the '80s. i wish he still had that mask!...

maybe this will just become an image/photo journal. i'm tired of words.

Mon, 09 May 2005 22:57:12 GMT

OH SHIT

Fri, 22 Apr 2005 19:05:57 GMT

tonight i will be taking the train down to Providence to see...

MELT BANANA!!!
thank the lord that they're playing an all ages show tonight. fuck you, middle east!

dragon eels are awesome...

Mon, 28 Mar 2005 22:43:15 GMT

Sat, 26 Mar 2005 14:35:55 GMT

Thu, 10 Mar 2005 22:31:53 GMT

Naked City complete studio recordings box set arrived today in the mail. Awesome. This quotation from Marc Ribot included in the booklet makes me smile:

"If people today accept that the hardcore band is at least as important a medium for serious composition as the symphony orchestra, we can thank John Zorn and Naked City. WHAT? You mean they still don't accept it? Morons."

california

Mon, 07 Mar 2005 22:22:15 GMT

This is definitely the prized picture from our trip. There is a good story behind it, but I'm too lazy to type it out. Let's just say we were browsing around UC Santa Cruz and these two old women asked us to "kiss the rat." How did I end up having to kiss the ass?:

Now for some contrast..the beach!:

meh mode

Sun, 06 Mar 2005 17:45:32 GMT

I finally updated and re-did some of my photo site. I'm now going to keep this damn thing maintained for a change! Let me know what you think.

http://www.sandpapersunlight.cjb.net

Mon, 28 Feb 2005 11:55:14 GMT

One thing I realized yesterday while I was organizing my negatives binder was that if I really want to seriously and intensely pursue photography into college (which i'm feeling stronger and stronger about), I really need to start LOOKING at and drawing inspiration from more photography. Up to this point, the only artistic medium I have really drawn inspiration from for my photos is music and although that's not a bad thing at all and I will continue to do so, it's now finally time for me to actually truly begin studying and drawing ideas from photographers and their work. If anyone on here, especially those of you who have seen my photos, would like to take a minute or two and recommend me a couple modern (or older) photographers you'd think i'd enjoy based on my own style, I'd be greatly appreciative. Thanks!

Sun, 27 Feb 2005 21:52:28 GMT

San Francisco was awesome. The Tides/One AM Radio/Wind-Up Bird show was awesome. Today I spent all afternoon gathering all my negatives from the past year and sorting them into a binder. I feel real organized now and I can now stop being lazy and begin going into the darkroom every morning and printing all the rolls of black&white I have shot since the beginning of summer that i haven't been able to print due to lack of a darkroom. San Francisco pics coming soon. I've tried to avoid talking about colleges here but I have to mention that the other positive thing that has happened to me recently is that I was admitted into Goucher, which was one of my top 3 choices. Baltimore here I come? Don't know yet until I've heard from Bard...

Sat, 19 Feb 2005 15:54:54 GMT

Sunday I leave for San Francisco for five days with Louis. no parents. completely by ourselves (except for sleeping at his Uncle's house who apparently stores weed brownies in his freezer so it doesn't seem like he'll be too uptight). So psyched. We're going to tear it up. I always tend to get gloomy before I go away though even if it is only for five days and with my best friend. I'm sure I'll get it over it. Then next Friday is the One AM Radio, Wind-Up Bird, Tides midnight show at the Coolidge which I'll just barely make since our plane will be arriving in Logan at 10:30 that night. If anyone here knows of any concert venues/art spaces that host GOOD jazz/rock concerts that are especially good in San Francisco please let me know. We definitely want to go hear as much music as possible but I'm worried about ending up at a Regattabar-esque jazz club. Someone called my photos "blobs" on Friday.

a couple new photos...

Wed, 16 Feb 2005 22:02:34 GMT

Sun, 02 Jan 2005 15:50:14 GMT

I watched Lynch's "Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me" last night with Caleb and Will and now I realize what Caleb was saying when he said Mulholland Drive was completely mediocre compared to this one. I really liked this one much more because it had a little bit more resolution and revelation of the story at the end than Mulholland Drive did while still, for a lack of a better word, "tastefully" leaving you in the dark.
I got a digital recorder for x-mas which I think will serve as a really cool tool for recording different sounds. My goal is to eventually start writing music with these sounds I record by compiling them and using instruments as well. Also recording shows would be awesome but I definitely would need a MUCH better mic if I want to go about doing that.
I've been listening to more and more classical recently. For awhile I've liked a lot of 20th century classical but recently 20th century and even Bach and Chopin have been producing a ton of emotion in me. My dad bought me Messiaen's "Quartet for the End of Time" which I think is amazing. I now really want to expand my classical collection (which now stands at four CDs hah). Besides always listening to music, I haven't been really inspired to play music a lot in the past weeks. I think it's really been playing music by myself that I haven't wanted to do (i.e. practicing).
Melt Banana is doing a Spring 2005 US tour. So fucking psyched! They're set to play the Middle East but I'm hoping to get a fake ID by then (even though I'll be 18 in less than 2 months at that point) or hope that they play Providence which is highly likely.
I finally finished "Discipline and Punish" by Michel Foucault a couple days ago which had a really strong effect on me. I highly recommend it to anyone. It's one of those books that you feel like you need to think about and study for months and months before you can start another one. We're going to be reading a lot of excerpts from it though in Philosophy class so I'll actually be able to discuss it in depth with other people.
I dreamt last night that my old ensemble teacher at NEC was eaten by a lion in the street.
Tsunamis are really horrible, but in the midst of depressing news, here's one survival story that I read: "...And on India's remote Andaman and Nicobar Islands, a woman who escaped the killer waves gave birth in the forest, AP news agency reported. She named her son Tsunami."

Current Playlist:
Anthony Braxton - Live in Dortmund, 1976
Messiaen - Quartet for the End of Time
Deerhoof - Holdy Paws
Disappearer - demo
Mingus - Black Saint and The Sinner Lady

Sun, 14 Nov 2004 05:30:53 GMT

rough guitar recording of a song i wrote a little ways back. it's a little sloppy and in desperate need of drums, but i felt like posting it anyways: temporarily untitled

time for my annoying victory post

Thu, 21 Oct 2004 15:12:19 GMT

Last night while walking down near Kenmore after the Red Sox won (YEAH!!) with Caleb, I realized it was the first time that instead of receiving cold, hostile stares from my fellow Bostonians, i received either a cheer of victory, a thumbs up, or just a huge smile.